Blog dare 9/29/11

The item of clothing I just can't bring myself to throw away.

It is this old ragged sweater I stole from my husband when we first got together 5 years ago. It is blue and black and has a picture of a rapper cartoon on the front of it. The funny part is I can't stand rap. I like to listen to metal and all that headbanging stuff. But this sweater is oversized and so comfortable. It is soft and keeps me warm during cold winter days. I can't stand winters and I live in Arizona lol. Plus it has a hoodie for me to cover up and keep extra warm.
This sweater has been through so much. When I wear it I can think of some memories I have in it. There is stains and holes all over it. I always say the stains and holes gives it character and that it has its own personality. Several of my family members have tried to sneak it out to the trash, but they have yet to succeed. As long as my sweater is in one piece it will remain in my possesion.

I married an ass!

Today was a really "fun" day. It reminded me of what an ass I married. It started out good. Got up in time and felt well rested. Made it to work early. Today was also payday and we had a lot to catch up on. During lunch I called my husband. He was already out of work and had been to the bank. This was around 12:30. I asked him if he could go make a car payment since it was already two weeks late. I asked him not to spend any other money until we sat down and went over what bills we need to pay. We are so far behind on our bills and scrimping to catch up.
I also talked to my husband about my car. It is running awful and sometimes dies at stop lights. I told him if we had enough money after bills I wanted to start with the spark plugs and maybe get the alternator tested. He said he wanted to replace the spark plug wires. I do know a thing or two about cars. The wires are still in good condition and do not need to be replaced. So I asked him not to buy them.
Later during the day I found out we had a refresh and once again I would be working late. I called my husband to see if he could bring me something since I didn't bring a lunch. This was around two. He whined about having to go and pick up the kids. He had an hour and a half tell he had to pick up the kids. He was just being a jerk about it.
So I finally got out of work 2 hours late. I called my husband. He was at home. I asked if he had gone down and made the car payment. He said no. When I asked him why he didn't he said he didn't have enough time. He had 3 hours since the time he left the bank and had to go pick up the kids. I asked him what he was doing and he said he wanted to go home and then he went to the auto store. He picked up the stuff I asked him not to buy and some "stuff" for his car.
Now understand we have already spent over 4000 dollars on his car. He has had a new transmission put in. Loads of work done. And a new stereo system with a dvd player. A couple weeks ago after his last car project, I asked him to put a hold on his car and work on mine. My car is barely running. So even after I asked him not to spend any money tell after we went over bills, he went and spent it anyways, and it was all for himself. By the end of the day I had just had enough. I was so mad I even posted on facebook what an ass he was. Something I try to sugarcoat when I post on facebook so no one knows how bad it really is. Plus we have some friends in common. As always stories get twisted around about what I posted and he tells them I am lying and just being a bitch. Part of the reason we have so little friends in common. He has told so many stories about me that everyone thinks I am just over reacting and I am to blame. So usually I try to keep it subtle so not to stir up anything else. Guess one to many buttons were pushed today.
Well there is my vent for the day.
Happy Reading!

My other blog is lonely

Visit me on my other blog: http://mommyandme-aaa.blogspot.com/.  It is lonely and needs some attention.
Happy Reading!

KITTENS!!!!

The kittens are here!  The kittens are here!  I don't know who is more excited, me or the kids lol.  So last night our momma cat was acting a little crazy.  So we had the feeling she was going to deliver soon.  I feel asleep on the couch.  At 1:30 in the morning I woke up to go to bed.  I found her under the bed having the kittens.  She is a first time mom and still young herself, so she was having some difficulties.  I was able to mover her and the two already born out from under the bed and into the bin.  I woke my daughter up cause I promised her I would if she had them.  So I had to help deliver a couple and help her get them cleaned up.  The whole time my daughter kept going "Eww gross.  Mom your not going to touch that.  Eww she's eating it.  Eww mom!"  It was funny listening to her.  She had seven total, but sadly the runt died a few minutes after birth. I know there is a kitty heaven out there for him or her.

Then a funny thing today.  I also have a 7 month old kitten.  The now momma cat helped raise her so she allowed the 7 month old to come in the bed with her and the babies.  Until the kitten decided it was time to play, and the she kicked her out.

So for those of you wondering.  Yes she will be fixed after this.  And for now we are going to enjoy the kittens until it is time for them to find a good home.

Happy Reading!

Taking bets!

So this weekend I am taking bets on what my house will look like Sunday night.  Let me give you a little background before you make the bet.  My husband is not the best caretaker in the world and he is lazy.  His idea of watching the children is yelling down the hall while he sits on the couch.  When I come home from work and ask why the living room is so messy, he tells me to ask the kids.  Lunch time is a free for all.  He lets them grab whatever they want and eat in the living room.  The kids have total control of the house.
When you ask him to help clean up, it is half assed.  His idea of doing laundry is taking the clothes out of the dryer and leaving them in the basket for me to put away.  I have to re-dry them to get rid of the wrinkles.  If you ask him to clean the bathroom he takes everything and shoves it under the cabinet.  All the cleaning supplies are under the kitchen sink.  They have been there since we lived there.  If you ask him where they are he will look at you and say, "I don't know."
This weekend the husband does not work and I do.  In fact I have two 12 hour days ahead of me since we had someone quit last week.  So now I am taking bets on what my house will look like by Sunday night.  My bet is it will look like a tornado landed on my house.  Does anybody else have any bets?

The perfect date

Last night I had the perfect date.  The evening was perfect.  It started with a nice warm bubble bath.  The candle light flickered off the walls.  The smell of wild flowers filling the hair.  And me totally at ease.  Than my date progressed to a movie and snuggling.  It was so quite and peaceful.  No trying to listen to the tv over screaming children.  I was so warm and cozy snuggling up on the couch.
Who was my date companion you ask.  It was me, myself, and I.  That's right.  A date with myself.  Being a mother of three kids and a wife to a "pita" husband; dates with myself are the best kind.  The kids went to bed early.  I filled up the top with hot water and my favorite bubble bath, then lit some candles for affect.  I laid there and just let my body soak up the warm water.  Closing my eyes, I let my other senses take everything in.  Then me and my favorite comforter snuggled up on the couch to watch a movie.  I woke up the next morning feeling so rejuvenated, that I couldn't help but agree to a second date.

Friday Night Fight Night

In this corner weighing in at --- pounds, Mommy.  And the challenger, weighing in at 40 pounds, Aiden the four year old.  This is scheduled for an endless amount of rounds.  First to give wins.
So during my staycation I noticed that my four year old is a royal spoiled brat.  If he doesn't get what he wants he throws a fit and gets it.  I have been watching him and seen his little mind twisting around.  It hasn't been always like this.  Before he went into custody I had no problem with discipline.  But since he came home a year ago, things have changed.  I am finding myself working a lot more and sometimes to tired to wait it out.  My husband who is now sober, doesn't have the patience to wait out his temper tantrums.  Also there is his medical issues.  He is early adhd and has a hearing delay that has slowed him down slightly.  Because of his age it is difficult finding a doctor to work with him.  But no problem, my 11 year old had the same issues and i survived him.
However Aiden has a new issue; hypo-sensory disorder.  This is where he does not get enough stimulation from everyday activities.  So to stimulate himself he becomes a dare devil.  Most parents would freak if they saw their four year old trying to climb to the rough.  Not me.  I am used to catching him doing those kinds of things.  But it takes a toll on me, I am so exhausted.  He can not be left alone for a minute.  And with my husbands inability to tolerate him, guess who gets all the work.
So during my staycation I decided I was not going to give into his temper tantrums.  I was going to keep doing all my daily routines and he can scream it out all he wants.  Boy does that kid have a set of lungs on him and stubborn as can be.  He gets that from his mom lol.  After a little while he moves on and then it starts again.  I keep telling myself that I have to be patient.  If I stay firm soon the tantrums will be over with.
Now I got to get the whole family not to give into his ways.  Tonight I was giving the girls a haircut.  Aiden would not leave us alone and kept trying to climb on the girls lap.  So I locked him out of the room.  He sat outside the door, screaming and kicking at it.  Then my husband comes in and tells me he is getting out of the house cause all the screaming is giving him a headache.  Really, you think.  Because tyenol has become my new best friend.  I know as Aiden gets older he will grow out of it, but tell then, we will see who can stand their ground the longest.

Ok some advice please

I need some tips and tricks about my blog page.  Today I could not post a comment to yesterdays edition.  It said my account does not allow that.  And how do I customize my page.  Help!!!!!!!!!!!

Physical Attraction

Can a person love someone that they are not physically attracted to? In my case the answer is yes. Despite all the bad mumblings I say about my husband, I do really care for him. Yet I have no physical attraction to him and do not want to be intimate with him. You see, over the last couple of years he has let go of himself. He does not take care of himself or his appearance. It will be several days before he takes a shower. The worst part of that is he works as a septic tank pumper/cleaner. A very stinky job. He also shaves only once every other week and will not trim his mustache so it starts going into his mouth.
I am not attracted to a man that does not take care of himself. I have tried to sit down and talk to him about how I feel, but that goes nowhere. He says if I love him I should want to be intimate with him no matter what.  I don't think that is the case.  At night i would ask him to shower and shave before bed. Now i am the demanding wife who treats him like a child. Really, cause i don't have a problem getting my three kids to take a shower. I have offered to take showers with him, but that is not to productive. The last couple of days I have even refused to kiss him. His mustache is so long and puffy that it runs into his mouth. It feels gross to kiss him.
So last night he goes in and takes a shower and shaves. Then he comes out in the living room and asks me to go back to the bedroom with him. I was not interested. "But I showered and shaved," he protests. If he had listen to me the hundred and one previous times I have tried to explain to him; he would know that taking one shower is not going to make me want to jump his bones. I am attracted to someone who regularly takes care of themselves and is proud of their appearence. Maybe one of these days he will get it through that rock of his. Until then I am deprived of any intimacy.

My first blog

This is my very first blog.  Yep, I have never blogged once in my life.  Recently I started reading a friends blog.  She and I are alike in many ways; which encouraged me to start blogging.  I thought for my first blog I would give you a little background about myself.  That way it will be easier to follow along if you read future blogs from me.
My name is Shannon and I am 31 years old.  I live in Arizona with my husband and kids.  I work in a retail store for the cell phone industry.  You could probably list me as extremely middle class.  Most of my blogs will be about my family life.  There is a reason I picked the blog name I did.  My husband and I marriage is not very good.  I love the man, but he is a complete idiot.  I almost named this blog "dear idiot."  As you follow along you will learn what I mean.
My kids are my life.  They keep me going.  I lost custody of them for a year from a cps case.  I am not ashamed of this.  It made me a stronger person and appreciate family more.  There is alot I want to accomplish out of life for both me and my children.
One of the reasons I started blogging is to get things out.  I have only a couple people I can talk to and I don't see them very often.  I do not have any family support and most people around me do not know what I really go through.  Maybe through blogging I can find some support.  Or at least clear my head.
Hope you enjoy,
Shannon